Thursday, April 2, 2009

Big changes ahead!!!

The name of my blog is That's Life... and I have been purposely avoiding anything that pertains to my actual life. I chose the name because my boyfriend was laid off from his job and was at the cigar shoppe talking to a lovely old man who started quoting a Frank Sinatra song. I obviously found out the song and immediately bought the CD for him. (Because I am that good!) Once I heard the song I started to cry. Life happens whether you want it to or not. That's Life. I have been all of these things, plus some. But I will start with these...

I've been a...
puppet-- I have lived my life pretending to be whatever my various puppeteers decide I should be.
pauper-- have had my own "economic stimulus plan" with regards to my finances.
pirate-- I have been convicted of a crime... DWI 2001... thought I could get away with it so I blew anyway...
poet-- I wrote a poem about a pink African Violet my sister gave me.
I love the way you sparkle.
I love the way you shine.
I love the way you're oooh so pink...
just like my behind!
pawn-- to most men I had met...
king-- let's change this to princess... I am Daddy's little princess and I was once Mommy's too (until the age of 14).

Anyway, my therapist has told me to write a journal. I just can't. My hands cramp because I put too much pressure on the pen/pencil. And I hate it when you run out of book and your hand has no place to rest. Also when you are writing on the back side of the page and you are right handed... it just doesn't work!

So, in order to appease my therapist and not freak my mom out I am going to go for a happy medium. I read three blogs this week(one, two, three) that all touched me in some way... I now want to share a section of my life that may touch you in some way. I have had a blessed life! I have also struggled with depression for most of it. I have seen things that should pull me right out of it and done things that will drag me back into it. I hope to learn from myself through this and maybe help someone along the way.

Please stick with me through this journey. I am scared! I don't know what will come of this... but I hope it is a ton!

Thank you!

P.S. and Billy... you heard him about July... you better get on it!


Adrienne said...

Hi Leslie --

I've suffered with depression for most of my life too although I've managed to get it under control over the last few years. Your therapist is right (no surprise) journalling helps - A LOT! In fact I think journalling is the one thing that helped me get my life back on track. I know how hard it is at the beginning, I remember sitting with a notebook and just crying because it hurt so much to have to think about all these things that I've been trying to avoid my whole adult life. You will be amazed at the things you discover about your self once you start writing, and you'll be doubly amazed when you go back and reread your writing in a few months time. I'll be following along with you & cheering you on! :)

Marci said...

Good luck through your journey. I know you can overcome anything - and it sounds like you have a wonderful man to help you through this! Hang in there....and I'll be praying for you.

I'm confused though...are you going to be journaling or blogging about it?

lesliecooper said...

I will be blogging instead of journaling. It seems my words flow more freely when I am typing... But, now that I have slept on it I am really nervous! It will be a surprise for all of us!


abby said...

I love your poem. Do this! But keep trying to journal too... MORE IS BETTER in this case. ;-)

I love you!

Brandie said...

You are so wonderful, I love you!!

Sandy & the sheep said...

The only way I can/will journal (like you 'as directed') is to have a file on my computer so I can type it. Hate to write! As a professional writer/reporter, kinda sad huh? Depression is the pits but you can do it-but easy for someone else to say right? ;0) Find what makes you happy too-I love your photography-absolutely wonderful. Hope you choose that path!! Sandy & the sheep

Dianna said...

hi! :) I had a hard time finding your blog after this whole stalker website mess. Anyways I got here! I have to totally agree with you about the journal thing! I thought it was just me :) maybe I can make you a journal that is bound at the top! genius! lol
anyways, good luck with your blogging. If you need a kick in the pants to get you going let me know-I will bug you! :) xo,dianna